Sushi Week, Day 4: Pass the Sake!


Editors’ Note: Whew! Welcome to Day 4 of Sushi Week. If you haven’t been tuning in for the drama, check out the earlier posts to get the full scoop…

So after all that medical drama, the Mischief Makers needed some sake! I’m usually not a fan…it has always tasted like hot hairspray to me, but after all we’d been through, it simply didn’t matter. So Matthew poured us sake shots and the rest is history…

Matthew: I think this is the drink that made the mischief happen.  Or was it the watermelon margaritas?  Hmmm, or was it the wine we started out with?  Wait, is this sushi week or another drunk week?  And we worked with sharp knives?!

Josh: Loss of Blood + Gain of Sake = Abundance of Mischief. Well, not at first. We had some sushi to catch up on after all the drama.

Josh: Turns out the secret to making that elusive rice-outside roll was SUPER complicated. Umm, flip it over, dumbass. For this roll, I added cooked shrimp, slivers of red bell pepper, panko for crunch, and then a squirt of srihacha! (I think I spell that a different way every time!)

Matthew: I closed my eyes when he flipped over the nori.  I imagined all the rice crumbling to the floor and Josh going into a super-squirrel rage.  But I forgot the sticking power of Josh’s sushi rice.

Matthew: Finally!  A wounded thumb could not keep him from completing his task…a perfect Inside-out Roll.

Josh: Can you tell I’m a little knife-shy? My fingers are all but leaping out of the way of the knife.

Matthew: Looks good enough to eat…and eat it, I did.

Josh: This one tasted much better than my first one. I also remembered at the last second that I had some masago (orange roe) to add on the top. It was actually very cheap at Whole Foods, even cheaper, actually, because it wouldn’t ring it up and the very cool cashier just gave it to me for free. I love cool hippies.

Matthew: Again with the lifted pinkie?!

Josh: And I’m not positive about this, but I think you’re mouth-breathing.

Matthew: (blank stare) I hate you.

Matthew: This was a tasty Tuna-Avocado Roll, topped with a little scallion.   For people who do not like sushi, this would be a good start…not too fishy.

Josh: It was very good — simple, yet flavorful. Notice our Wasabi Tadpole Friend swam over. I think I’ll name him Walter.

Matthew: While Josh continued to make sushi rolls and drink sake, I decided to make a little hand roll.  I made a spicy crab salad by taking about a cup of crab meat, 2 tablespoons of olive oil mayo, a tablespoon of scallions, a dash of soy sauce and srirachi chili paste to taste.  Add that to a half sheet of nori with a dollop of rice, some carrots and asparagus tips.  That was the easy part. Rolling into a cone? A different story.

Josh: This crab salad was like the one “recipe” we can share that was delicious. Matthew got some great crab from Costco, and all of the filling was delicious. The presentation, however…well let’s just say he is braver than I.

Matthew: So basically, as you can see, I just conformed that nori around that filling with no proper folding.  It looked like I wrapped it in an old, wet leaf.

Josh: Sorry, Matthew…I have to agree. It kinda looked like catfood in a cocoon. 😉

Matthew: You know what?  It’s does look like it has just emerged from a cocoon.  Lawd, that will be one ugly butterfly.

Matthew: We hung Ray from the ceiling for this aerial view.  We were thinking…maybe from that distance this hand-roll will look good?

Josh: We called it quits before radio-ing in a helicopter for a pass. Let’s just focus on the fact that it was delicious.

Matthew: The margaritas, wine and sake were kicking in and we were running low on ideas and patience because of that blasted plastic-wrap covered piece of hell called a sushi mat.  So Josh decided to put all the meats on one roll — crab salad, tuna and shrimp…oh yeah, he went there.  I am so glad he did.

Josh: I figured, “everyone craves meat-lover’s pizza, so why not meat-lover’s sushi?” Seriously, I was pretty lit by this point. I may or may not have been wearing pants. But in the midst of mischief, genius was born. It was my favorite roll of the night. Of course if you ordered it at any restaurant its cost would be e-nori-mous.

Matthew: (Blank stare) Really?  A nori joke?

Josh: Sorry…I had to get in one wretched pun.

Matthew: I want to marry this roll — too bad it is illegal in this state, so I will live in sin with it.

Josh: If you ever decide to tie the knot, I will officiate your ceremony.

Despite injury and rising blood-alcohol levels, we managed to survive Sushi Week. But wait — the fun ain’t over yet. Tune in on Friday to find out what happened after we put the knives away. Here’s a hint: It was pure mischief!


5 Responses to “Sushi Week, Day 4: Pass the Sake!”

  1. David Says:

    “e-nori-mous” really? Johnny Miller would be so proud.

  2. Jamie Says:

    I guess I am going to have to break down and go eat sushi this weekend… Yours looks so good. Although I will stick with wine or beer – I’m not sure how it would go with strawberry margaritas.

    And all the pics just show how hard you were working – you should really try to have more fun when you’re cooking. 😉

  3. Ray Says:

    Why is Matthew talking to himself?

    This article is making me break out

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